Your Kids & Pets

Are you teaching your child/children to respect your dog? WHAT? What do you mean?! Shouldn't my dog respect my child?!

Actually the answer is no. I know. Shocker. Some may not agree with this mindset but... let me share my experience.

Jagger LOVES people. Absolutely loves them. So when we had Jaxon I had no real worries. When Jaxon became mobile I started to see a difference in Jagger. If Jaxon moved towards him sometimes, he would show teeth or growl. Now, as a parent your first instinct is to immediately blame and reprimand the dog because after all growling and showing teeth automatically means that your dog must be aggressive right? WRONG. So wrong. This is where teaching your children to respect your dog comes into play. Let me break it down.

Growling is a form of communication. It's actually GOOD if the dog vocalizes with a growl as opposed to reacting with a bite. Jagger is saying " Hey I am NOT comfortable with this. Please back away". So what are you suppose to do? As a dog owner, you need to protect your dog and get them OUT of a situation they are not comfortable with. I'm sure you are wondering " Well if he's uncomfortable can't he just move?" Sure he can...but maybe he doesn't want to because he decided to lay there first before my toddler decided to invade his space? I mean, do you want to get up from your seat when you just sat down? No. So you need to TELL you're dog to move to a different spot. You literally have to save your dog from it's discomfort. In turn, teach your toddler that if your dog is trying to rest...please let him be. After all when WE are trying to rest the last thing we want is our toddler rolling all over us.  

Another thing to consider is your dog does not know the intentions of your toddler. Is this tiny human going to hit me? Squeeze me? Step on my tail? Hug me? They literally have no idea...so again its our job as dog owners to take control of the situation and remove them. 

Now, I know this all sounds like a lot to take in. I'm sure you're wondering...well does this mean EVERY time my baby goes near my dog I have to tell them to move? No. Here's the thing. Dog owners who's children get bitten by their dog's think that it just happened out of the blue. I can assure you...IT DOES NOT. Dogs express themselves in so many ways that you may not even realize and I can guarantee your dog may have been displaying signs of discomfort for a long time before they had, had enough and actually chose to correct them with a bite. 

Things to look out for: Is your dog panting or breathing heavy for no apparent reason? Do you see your dog licking it's lips as your child passes by? Does your dog tuck it's ears back when your child comes near or if your child is petting them? These are all signs of an anxious dog...and all of these will be displayed usually before growling comes into play. A bite comes AFTER all of these things have been displayed. And again....a bite is a dog's way of CORRECTING. So the goal is to NEVER let it get to the point where your dog feels the need to CORRECT your child. This is why is it your job to teach your child to respect your dog (and also exercising them to expel that anxious energy) !!! 

If your dog is displaying any of these behaviors please seek professional help before rehoming! Of course our children come first and sometimes unfortunately rehoming might be necessary but sometime the answers are so very simple! And you know what? If you truly can't afford training, or truly believe your dog may thrive away from children...then there is no shame in finding an amazing new home for your dog. 

I know more than anyone how admitting your dog had growled at your child is probably the most embarrassing thing to tell someone. I know the fear of being judged for wanting to keep a dog who has growled at my child. I can promise you...YOU ARE NOT ALONE and please don't be ashamed or embarrassed. There are soooooooo many people going through the same exact thing. As parent's we have to learn how to deal with raising a small child...and so does your dog!! Don't be afraid to ask for help!! 

I hope sharing this will help some families who have been going through the same thing. Thank you for reading! Let me know your thoughts. 

Alexi xo 

Stuggles with 2 under 2

     Hunter Ray Maynard. Born via induction 12/19/18 at 11:09 AM weighing 7 pounds, 11 ounces and 21.5 inches long. Almost two pounds heavier than his bigger brother was! Just like that, he completed our little family. 

   2 under 2 is a SCARY ass thought. Nothing scared me more than thinking of how the HELL am I going to take care of two small children at the same time. Jaxon still VERY much needs me. For starters he's still in his crib. (No, I do not plan on taking him out anytime soon. He does just fine in his crib and I'm not trying to fix something that's not broken.) He still needs to be put in his highchair for meals, he still needs to be watched like a HAWK, he's still in diapers, AND he's not fully conversational yet (we are almost there though). So the thought of taking care of him AND a newborn who I have to nurse every 2 to 3 hours was and STILL is a terrifying. 

   For starters, let me just say mentally I am WAY more relaxed than I was when I first had Jaxon. I definitely struggled with my new role as a mother and post partum depression. I've never been one to hide that. I struggled a lot. This time, I am actually able to enjoy (? not sure if I really want to use the word enjoy because the newborn stage kind of sucks lol.)  the newborn stage....maybe appreciate it is a better way of describing it. I am not sure if it's because I kind of know what I'm doing this time, or if it's because I am busier this time with my first born, or maybe it's because I feel great after just having Hunter as opposed to how much pain I was after having Jaxon. Perhaps it's all of the above. I am just thankful to not having that dark cloud looming over me. 

  Because I am feeling better this time around, I find myself talking to Hunter. I never talked to Jaxon as a newborn. I also find myself really trying to get breastfeeding down, another thing I didn't care to do much the first time. And now.....(here comes the dark cloud)....because I am appreciating all these things and because I am interacting with Hunter so much it makes me sad to think how I couldn't do this for Jaxon. *Cue the tears* This is what I have been struggling with. The serious mom guilt. It doesn't help that I am only one person and when I'm nursing Hunter and Jaxon gets hurt and wants me to kiss his boo boo that I can't because my hands are full. When Gil is at work and I am alone with the boys, I can't help but cry because of how guilty I feel for not enjoying my time with my Jaxon and not being able to give him all my attention now. I think because of this, even though I am feeling better, I am having a hard time bonding with Hunter and letting my heart REALLY expand. Don't read that the wrong way. Of COURSE I love Hunter and I am obsessed with him. But it's similar to how I felt with Jaxon in the way that I did not feel that connection at first. It's happening again but in a very different way.

  Just like I had to learn to own motherhood... I now have to learn how to be a mother of two. I now have to learn how to balance my two boys, my husband, and myself. I have to learn to accept that I cannot change how I was with Jaxon as a newborn. The best the I can do is know that I did the BEST that I could with Jaxon, despite that dark cloud that loomed over my heard in those early weeks. And now I have to be and do the BEST I can for Hunter in these early days. This is my truth. 

  As the days go by, it gets a little easier day by day as we build some sort of routine. Watching Jaxon interact with his new little brother makes my heart EXPLODE. I CANNOT wait until Hunter is able to start interacting back. Those moments make everything SO worth it! I can't wait to see what the future holds <3. 

Thanks for reading!

love,

Alexi xo

A Letter To My Son. Our Days Are Limited.

My Dearest Jaxon,

Our days are limited together. Soon, your little brother will enter our world and it will no longer just be you and I. Soon you will feel like you have to share me. I have cried often thinking about having to share my love with another child. Even right now... I fear this.

Know that you were my first love. You always will be. Mommy's heart will have to grow to make room for your baby brother, but know that it grew first because of you. YOU made me a mommy. YOU showed me what a mother's love really is. YOU showed me what instant love and fear was.

Before you entered my world, I had NO clue how to care for a newborn or a child of any age for that matter. I often feared what kind of mother I would be. Daddy had to even show me how to change your diaper in the hospital. You challenged me to put my fears behind me and be the best mommy I could possibly be. You showed me of all that I was truly capable of. You made me feel so proud. I didn't think I could ever do this...but because of you I saw a side to myself I never even knew existed because I wanted to be the best mommy I could be for you. You have changed me forever Jaxon and I love you so much for it. 

Your role is now about to change. You will no longer be the only child...but will now be the big brother. I know you will be the best big brother. I know you will look after him and teach him things that mommy and daddy can't. While I will have to share my love with you two, mommy couldn't think of a greater present to give you than a life long best friend. When daddy and I are long gone, you two will have each other. Love him and protect him always. 

Know this my sweet boy I will ALWAYS LOVE YOU. You will ALWAYS be my first love. You will ALWAYS be the one who changed me forever. I will forever look at you and know that because of you, I am who I am. I love you Jaxon. 

Love always,

Your Mom. 

Photographer Collab: Orange Sunshine Photo

Blogging has really been a true adventure the last two months. I have had a couple collaborations thus far that I have been so excited about and so grateful for. This collaboration has definitely been the most fun and most unique of them so far. 

Cristina reached out to me only a couple weeks after I started my Instagram page asking to do a collaboration with me. After talking with her and looking through her work I knew this was going to be an amazing opportunity. Her work and editing is TRULY unique and incredible!! She also models and designs herself!! I was super excited to work with her. 

A few weeks after our initial discussion we finally picked a date and met. She took me to an AMAZING spot in Edgewater by the George Washington Bridge and Hudson River. I am not going to disclose exact location as I will leave that up to her to reveal to her clients. (It's that beautiful). She brought two of her own dresses with her (the one I am wearing in the two photo's above) and I also brought my own outfits with me as well. She made me feel SOOOOOO comfortable guys. She directed me and posed me perfectly. She chose beautiful spots to take shots and made sure it looked perfect. You can tell she takes a lot of pride in her work.

Cristina's editing is honestly to die for. I mean, I don't think I need to explain it because you can just see it in her work. It really looks like it should be in a magazine. I wish I could just bring her a lot with me for every blog post! lol. 

I highly recommend checking her work out. I promise you it will be some of the most unique set of photos you will take!! Below I will link her website and social media platforms.

THANK YOU CRISTINA for collabing with me. It was truly such an honor. 

Thank you for reading!! 

Alexi xo. 

CRISTINA'S PAGES!

-Website: CLICK HERE 

-Instagram: @Cristinaskyler CLICK HERE 

- Photography Instagram: @OrangeSunshinePhoto CLICK HERE 

-Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Orangesunshinephoto/

Pink Blush Collab!!

Finally, I am able to show you guys my Collaboration and Brand Ambassadorship with Pink Blush (Click Here For Pink Blush Site)!!! Guys, this was a dream brand to be able to collab with and I wanted to give their brand justice by getting great pictures. I happened to collab with an AMAZING photographer to give me the best pictures of what Pink Blush sent me (There will be a separate blog ALL about the photographer I used for this shoot as well.) SO let me go ahead and share the two items they sent me :) 

The first item I received from Pink Blush is this adorable black striped colorblock ruffle sleeve top. This top is a fall ESSENTIAL GUYS!!! Black and white stripes during the fall is a personal favorite. I really love how the entire neckline is completely black and the little ruffles at the end of the sleeves just makes this top so sweet. I also have to add how incredibly soft and comfortable this top is. I decided to pair this top with black ripped maternity jeans ALSO by Pink Blush (purchased myself), thigh high heeled boots, and a black hat. Slap on a bold lip color and you are fall ready!! Go ahead and put on a cute pair of black booties or black over the knee boots for some extra comfort. :) 

-This top is also available in navy blue and grey. 

Pink Blush also sent me this gorgeous blue pinstripe off the shoulder top. Besides the adorable bell sleeves and the off the shoulder look....what's so great about this top is it could be worn in ANY season. I paired this top with the same black ripped jeans and a pair of black booties... but throw on a pair of white jeans with sandals or wedges and you have yourself a spring/summer look! 

I can't say enough good things about how cute Pink Blush clothes are!!! These tops are SUCH good quality and they are such an amazing brand!! They are super quick with shipping, CONSTANTLY have great sales, and you KNOW their customer service is amazing when they offer free return shipping. You can tell this company takes great pride in their products. Let me just add as well....BEST MATERNITY JEANS EVER!!!! I seriously think I am going to bring them to my seamstress to make these into NON-maternity jeans once I'm no longer pregnant...that's how much I love them lol. (Can you even do that?).

I will have links to both tops and maternity jeans linked below!! Thank you so much for reading.

Love,

Alexi x0

Photographer: Follow @CristinaSkyler @Orangesunshinephoto 

DIRECT LINKS:

-Black Striped Color Block Ruffle Sleeve Top: CLICK HERE

-Blue Pinstripe Off the Shoulder Top: CLICK HERE

-Maternity Jeans (purchased these myself). They don't have them in black anymore but they have them other amazing colors : CLICK HERE

-Another option for the black jeans : CLICK HERE

Product Review: Luli Bebe Diaper Bag!

The Luli Bebe Diaper bag aka THE HOLY GRAIL diaper backpack. Let me just tell you guys, this product right here is what really inspired me to start blogging. Let me give you a tiny back story: So I was on my personal Instagram account one night when I saw one of my favorite mommy's on Instagram. @Zi.__ ( if you don't already follow her you should!) post about a giveaway she was doing with Luli Bebe. Figuring I would give it a shot, I entered as I have been DYING for this diaper bag forever. Turns out I ended up winning the giveaway!! (Yes guys, real people actually win these giveaways. You won't win if you don't enter!) I was literally crying!! lol. Luli Bebe and Zi were SOOO sweet. When I received this baby in the mail, I almost fell to the floor and KNEW this needed to be a product review post for my blog. Anyway, let's get to it. 

So besides this bag being gorgeous, there are so many other great things about it. First of all it is made of vegan leather and is stain resistant. It features two hooks at the top where you can hook a large strap they include to give you the option to wear it over the shoulder AND they also provide you with stroller straps! It doesn't stop there as they also include a changing pad!  There are so many compartments on the inside for diapers, snacks, bottles, and whatever else you need. The backpack straps are also adjustable! It features two pockets on the side for sippy cups and bottles as well as front pocket with a zipper and magnet button. 

Before this diaper backpack I owned a JuJu Bee diaper bag and an Itzy Ritzy diaper bag. This bag, in my opinion, blew them out of the water. Juju Bee diaper backpacks are absolutely adorable, but there is not enough space inside. By the time my son was 5 months I ran out of room to put stuff in there! I then turned to the Itzy Ritzy diaper backpack which was also very cute but not really my style. I liked the features it had and how big it was, but I hated the way the bag opened up. Everything would spill out if I opened it too wide which drove me nuts. The Luli Bebe diaper backpack in the style Monaco  is the perfect mix of the things I liked about my past two bags...and even better!! 

This bag comes in 5 different beautiful colors: Black, Latte (a nude color), Pastel Pink, Pearl White, and my personal favorite, Stone Grey. Luli Bebe also sells two other different style diaper bags that are just as gorgeous!!! 

It's an honor to be a brand ambassador for this amazing company. They are seriously one of the sweetest companies ever and have excellent customer service!! You can use my discount code Alexi25 for 25% percent off your orders!! (Be aware the code is case sensitive.) I hope you guys check this bag out and love it as much as I do!! Check them out at https://www.lulibebe.com/

Thank you for reading!!

Love,

Alexi xo

Direct link to my exact bag: https://www.lulibebe.com/product-page/monaco-diaper-bag-stone-grey

To the other mamas....

The other mamas. The angels. MY angels. My support. The reason why I have made it this far. The reason for my sanity. Guys....This saying is everything and more. No truer words honestly. 

While motherhood is the greatest blessing, MOTHERHOOD. IS. HARD. Not one book or anyone's advice can prepare you for this lifestyle change. Becoming a mother is taking on an entire new identity....even if you think you're ready you really have no idea how TRULY challenging it is to take on this new role. As much joy that it comes with it also comes with guilt, fear, doubt, loneliness, isolation, uneasiness, and anxiety.

Those feelings can really make you feel so alone. It will make you feel that no one understands. It will make you feel so ashamed. It makes you question if you are fit for this role and if you are good enough. Let me reassure you, YOU ARE NOT ALONE...your mama angels understand.  They understand you in a way no one has. As much as we all love our husbands...as much as I LOVE my husband, and as much of a help he is, even he does not understand. It's truly not possible for him to comprehend how I feel and I do not expect him to. But my mama friends do. 

They get me when I text them to tell them how much of a bad mood I'm in because Jaxon took a shorter nap than usual. They get it when I tell my patience is running low because he's been crying and pulling on me all day to be picked up and I'm just too damn tired. They understand the utter joy when he sleeps in late. They get the anxiety I have when I bring him out in public and all he does is scream in the stroller while I'm trying to just get out of the house for an hour or so for my own sanity. They know the fear I feel when I become concerned about his development. They feel the anger I feel when I tell them someone was mean to him at the park. THEY. JUST. GET. IT. And I get them. 

Then there are the mamas that you DON'T know personally and probably have never met....but damn you are thankful for those women. When you post a story on your Instagram account that your son took an hour nap, and you get that message from a woman you don't even know saying the same thing happened to them. They tell you how frustrating it is. And you GET it and they get you. 

And probably the most amazing part of all of this....to the mamas who have reached out to me and tell me how much of a support I have been to them. To the ones who say they trust and look up to my advice. To the ones who say they couldn't do it without me..... ME!!? Are you sure you mean ME? I have been given many compliments in my life....but those compliments are BY FAR the best compliments I have every received in my entire life. It gives me the greatest joy to know that I'M able to help other moms. 

Being a mom is hard. I can say that a million times. Being. A. MOM. IS. HARD. But here I am, KILLING it....because of the amazing women who have supported me through this amazing journey. I thank you and love you all. Even to the moms that I don't even know who have touched my heart. I am so thankful for you all. 

Thank you for reading...

Alexi xo